Consumer-Car Relationships

Our Mazda

The other day, I parked our Mazda 3 in the parking lot of Tesco (supermarket).  I reversed to straighten out the car a couple times so it was exactly between the designated lines.  When I opened my driver's side door, I judged the tiny wedge of space between my car and my neighbor's.  Drawing my breath in, I stuck my leg out and proceeded to shimmy my body out of the car, grazing my belly and jeans pockets between both cars in the process.  If you own a car in England, you have to lose weight.

This is not the first time this has happened to me.  I would guess about every other week, I am faced with a similar situation.  Car spaces tend to be narrow and people are good about parking their cars between the lines.  However, when sandwiched between cars BOTH edging toward my lines, it's a problem.  My one dramatic incident was at Christmas time when the Tesco lot was totally jammed and I was required to take a slim space next to the covered cart/trolley return shed.  That was the day I learned to fold in my side mirrors before opening the door and nearly resorted to a pre-shimmy parka removal.  I also considered crawling out the trunk.  But I managed.  Somehow.

In England, there are big cars and small cars.  But mostly small cars.  And it totally makes sense why.

I've seen some beautiful cars pull up outside our kids' school on School Hill.  Someone has a Lamborghini Testarossa parked on the gravel pathway to the school gate.  Everyday, hundreds of children and parents (and sometimes dogs) march past that car, possibly brushing against it in the process, and most certainly getting dust on it, not to mention the sideways rain.  It's a beautiful car, but it can't be sheltered from people and the elements.

There is a souped up Mercedes that periodically shows up at morning drop off.  Like all the other cars, it has to squeeze into spaces on School Hill, with the occasional tree branch or bush grazing its wing mirrors or sunroof.  You can't be too protective of your car here.  Because much of England was built pre-car, there are charming, little roads that were put in around houses and buildings.  Which means your car will have to do some squeezing.  Sometimes it's just a gorse bush brushing against your windows.  In other instances, it means two-way traffic can funnel into one when you least expect it.

Have you ever driven up Storeton Lane?  Or past the pub up School Hill?  Turn a busy corner at the hat shop or pub and put on the brakes.  There may be cars coming at you.  The rules of safety etiquette require that you wait; otherwise, someone has to back up.  Crashing would do no one any favors.  Politeness on the road and waiting your turn is a necessity.  You must always be thinking.  You cannot zone out.

When I drive in San Diego or State College, my car is a bubble.  I keep to myself barring the occasional wave to a neighbor or friend driving by.  When I drive through Heswall, there is a need to be in touch with those driving around you, to acknowledge other drivers.  Because two-way roads often have cars parked along them, weaving becomes a natural part of driving.  If cars are parked on your side, you pause to allow cars on the other side to pass first.  Out of politeness, everyone does a quick wave of acknowledgement and thanks.  On the rare occasions that there is no wave, you feel annoyed.

Because roads are narrow, people park their cars partly on the curbs to leave more room for cars on the road to get by.  And you can park whichever direction is easier to get in.  If you're the Lamborghini or Mercedes owner, you would do the same.  That is just how it is.  Roads and parking are the great equalizer in the UK.

Speaking of curbs, I did have the unfortunate incident of misjudging my drive up The Mount on the way to Tesco one day.  I couldn't see around the corner properly and was supposed to give way to a giant bus coming down the road.  I tried to reverse, but then another car pulled up behind me.  I didn't know what to do.  Mr. Bus Driver didn't bat an eyelash.  He just kept driving toward me and then turned his wheels up on to the sidewalk and drove essentially sideways down the road past my car. Embarrassed, I tried to look as non-American as possible.  And I hope none of the passengers recognized me.  They probably did.