Scenes from Christmas Day

Awesome musical tie from Anna

Watching The Queen's Speech at 3pm

Wearing Christmas cracker crowns for dinner at grandma's

Bad Gingerbread Houses

For the past several years, the Chang/Couplands make a gingerbread house at Christmas time.  One year, the roof caved in, but my sister-in-law caught it from collapsing.  Another year, my nephew  commented that it looked like the house was bombed and Santa was bleeding to death.  (He was right.)  The year with the Christmas Village was uneventful but unattractive.  This year was pathetic.

Grandma and Grandpa Coupland bought us a beautiful, gourmet German gingerbread house kit from a boutique near Blenheim Castle.  When we opened the box, the smell of gingerbread was gorgeous.  The gingerbread was soft and thick, not the hard cardboard stuff you get from Target.  The candies were bright, beautiful and very tasty.  

Unfortunately, we had some issues with the icing.  Apparently, "Whisk until stiff peaks foam" is important.  At least we had fun watching the gummy bears slide down the A-frame.  It all tasted good too.

Anna's face says it all

Mince Pies and the Spirit of Christmas

Mince pie and sherry for Santa. We thought he'd like the napkin.

In the US, the holiday season is shared among different religions and occasions.  You might see a Christmas tree and menorah in downtown State College, a Kwanzaa flag or candles on display, festive holiday lights strung across the streets, people ringing bells for the Salvation Army.  There might be a nod to the holiday season in the public schools.

Here, it is all Christmas all the time.  Images of Santa (or more iconically called Father Christmas), mince pies, Christmas crackers, Rudolph ears, Christmas trees all along the road, kids in nativity costumes, Christmas ties, flambed Christmas pudding... very spirited and festive. I've learned to say "Happy Christmas" instead of "Happy Holidays".  I have had nice conversations with shopkeepers about Christmas traditions.  Most people have turkey at dinner.  A lady at the Village Shop told me that Father Christmas' reindeer used to leave magical glitter footprints in their living room.

Not being familiar with mince pies in the US, I did a little reading up on the tradition.  Apparently, they traditionally represent Jesus' cradle and started out large, oval shaped and filled with different types of minced meat in addition to fruit, sugar and peel.  They became popular in the 1400's and then modified and reshaped and resized over time with the introduction of new spices brought back from the Medieval Crusades.  A star on top represents Christ, though there can be other decorations.  Mince pies used to be quite a status symbol and have now completely infiltrated the masses.

Uncle Malcolm's family dinner

As part of the Christmas spirit, going out for a Christmas lunch with a group in December seems quite common.  Our art group organized a Christmas lunch at a nice pub.  The Year 1 mums at school invited me for Christmas lunch at Thornton Hall--very beautiful old oak room, all the mums were looking fabulous and donned crowns from our Christmas crackers, some had cocktails or wine, and enjoyed a traditional roast.  Uncle Malcolm invited our extended family for dinner at Pollard's.  There are always Christmas crackers.  It is good fun to wear a crown, exchange riddles and check out the prizes.  We struck gold at Uncle Malcolm's dinner where we got little brushes in our crackers, perfect for cleaning school uniforms!

Mince pies and nibbles at our Christmas Eve gathering

It is also quite common to be invited for mince pies and sherry at a friend or neighbor's house.  Just a quick drink and a chat, meet a few people,, catch up.  We had family and our neighbors over on Christmas Eve for such an occasion.  Our neighbor across the road invited us around on another day for drinks and to celebrate her grandson's 1st birthday.  We had never met (though the kids know her through Sally)--it was a nice gesture, and we enjoyed meeting her family and neighbors over a celebratory drink.

Dressing up--whether a little bit fabulous or festive--also seems the thing to do.  Shopkeepers often wear holiday pins, ties, hats.  Michael and Anna got some pretty cool Christmas accessories at the Village Shop and in their comics.

Aren't you a little skinny for a stormtrooper?

Christmas breakfast

Christmas is the New Valentine's Day

I love this card; from one of our favorite Heswall families

I walked Anna into school the other day to help her change into her nativity costume.  One of her Year 2 classmates was standing there handing out little cards in envelopes.  When Anna received hers, we opened it to find a sweet Christmas card inscribed with "Dear Anna: I hope you have a nice Christmas. Love, Jemima."  Anna was delighted but not surprised.  Apparently, she has built up quite a store of Christmas cards in her backpack.  So has Michael.  The cards are all small and part of multi-packs of about 30, as if someone has thought about this as a business proposition.  Sometimes, there's a chocolate attached to the envelope.  Some children deposit their Christmas cards in the Christmas postbox in the hallway at school and the teacher hands them out at afternoon registration.

My immediate thought was, "Christmas is just like Valentine's Day", followed by, "Oh no, am I going to have to persuade Anna and Michael to write 60 Christmas cards?"  (The answer I came up with was no.)  Michael in fact got two Moshi Monster cards from one of his classmates--the one who was very keen on him going to the school disco.  Accident or not, I thought it helped make my point about it being like American Valentine's Day.  (Incidentally, I found out later on that UK Valentine's Day is reserved for sweethearts.  Whereas in the US, kids are encouraged to give a valentine to all classmates, here it tends to be much more selective.)

Like Valentine's Day in the US, chocolates seem to be a big deal here at Christmas.  They were handed out at the carols celebration, and we have received a number of packages of chocolate as presents for the children.  It is wall-to-wall chocolate down the seasonal aisle of Tesco--lots of attactive tins and boxes dressed in Christmas theme.  Red of course plays a dominant role but without the hearts.

Going back to the Christmas cards, they are in some ways a much bigger deal here.  They tend to be handwritten and sent as a "hello" to neighbors, teachers, etc.  We've received several nice cards from neighbors we've never met.  Americans tend to send photo cards or Christmas letters, especially if one has children.  People are more modest here because I imagine the card is meant to give attention to the recipient as opposed to the giver.  Like Valentine's Day.

Christmas Preparations

Some Christmas preparations...

"It's perfect!"  Our Charlie Brown tree from Church Farm.

Present for sister

Anna removes the ornaments from Grandma and Grandpa's tree (only occasionally)

Christmas Gift Afternoon (and My Failure at Marketing)

Michael at Christmas Gift Afternoon

Christmas Gift Afternoon is probably my favorite event so far.  It is a December fundraiser for the school in which pupils can come in at a set time to buy Christmas presents.  The school hall is set up with tables of presents on display and multiple wrapped versions behind them.  Every present is £2, and pupils may buy two gifts total.  They can then label the gifts and take them home.

I helped out with this event and really enjoyed the festive atmosphere.  You are surrounded by presents and lots of mums who've come to help sell or wrap presents.  We were each given Rudolph ears to wear.  The organizer even wore a run light up Rudolph nose and offered mince pies and shortbread tree shaped biscuits to us, and the head teacher (principal) even came around in his holiday tie with cups of tea.  A nice way to feel the holiday spirit.  I chatted with some really nice mums.

My favorite moment was seeing Michael and Anna walk in together, smiling.  They headed straight for my table to say hello.  They were so sweet, looking very tidy in their uniforms.  I pointed Michael to the waterproof camera/phone pouch that I'd quite like as a Christmas present.  He tried to buy it for me on the sly.  I saw him also take Anna over to another musical tie table.  (John would later be the recipient of said tie, his favorite gift.)

I manned a table with (in order of popularity): water bottles in blue or pink (most popular), Maltesers, a musical Santa tie, gloves, an ice scraper, and a shoe shine kit (very unpopular).  I enjoyed studying the children's purchase behavior.  The color and height of the water bottles were very attention getting so they got a lot of "play"--eyeing, touching, talking to a friend about it.  The Maltesers may have caused salivation in more than one buyer.  I was asked a number of times about the shoe shine kit.  Typical interaction:

Pupil:  Excuse me, but what is this, please?
Me:  Oh, it's a shoe shine kit.
Pupil:  What is a shoe shine kit?
Me:  It's for making your mum or dad's shoes nice and clean and shiny.  There's some polish, a mitt...
(Pupil starts looking around in disinterest.)
Pupil:  Thank you.
(Walks off)

After the fourth incident, it occurred to me that I was being too product focused and not consumer focused.  Why would a kid be interested in clean shoes?  I should know that.  I teach marketing, but clearly am not in the mindset leveraging my skillset.  My helper neighbor was brilliant.  Trying to peddle the last of our wares, she'd ask the kids if their mummy or daddy like to keep their shoes looking nice.  A better angle, a better sale.

Another interesting thing.  A boy and his younger brother accidentally walked off with gloves without paying.  I asked my neighbor if they paid her, and she said she didn't think so.  A few minutes later, the two boys came back and apologized realizing their mistake.  They were so polite, forking over the money.  I would like to tell their mother that she's raised some nice kids.

The Pantomime: A Christmas Tradition

John suggested that we take the kids to see a pantomime, a Christmas tradition in England.  I was imagining a white faced man pretending to palm-walk a wall.  It turns out this pantomime is way better.

From the start, the excitement was contagious.  Families poured into the Liverpool Empire theatre.  Little girls were dressed in sparkly princess dresses, some had tiaras and matching slippers.  There were flashing, colorful light wands for sale.  There was an old-fashioned candy kiosk with large jars of candy scooped into cups.  When we got to our seats, we looked around at the rainbow of wands flickering around us.  The stage curtain was shimmering.  Anna noticed a disco ball just below our balcony.  This was going to be fun.

When the show began, the music was hopping.  The cast was made up of semi-celebs who could really sing, wearing colorful costumes.  There was a man in drag.  The whole show was very camp.  There were lots of corny jokes, an audience sing along, and lots of shouting out to and from the audience (e.g., "He's behind you!", "No, he isn't!", "Yes, he is!")  I loved seeing Anna hop up from her seat to dance.  We all really enjoyed it.  I hope we go every year.

Grandpa read that pantos are being introduced in the US.  Will this format and humor work as well with a US audience?  I hope so.

Looking smart for the panto

Michael the Fencer

I like that Michael got to take fencing lessons this term at school.  It seems so European!  Michael was among the smallest there but was quite agile.

En garde!

Michael corners his opponent

Lunchtime Superstar: A Lesson in Working the System

Recently, Anna has been coming home most days with a "Lunchtime Superstar", St. Peter's Primary" sticker on her uniform.  She used to only get them every once in a while.  She also used to live in fear of not finishing her lunch and having one of the dinner ladies tell her off.  I've shared a good laugh with another mum who tells me that her child always has a "microscopic" lunch.  We've decided that this is the way to cope on our end.

Anna told me that she discovered that it's easy to get a sticker.  You eat all of your lunch and show one of the dinner ladies who will then present you with a sticker.  Smart.  So she has learned this routine and this makes her delighted.  The other day, while walking home, she tried to share with Michael her insights on how to get the Lunchtime Superstar sticker.  I thought very cute listening to her explain this, hoping Michael will one day work the system too.

Packing school lunches this year has changed my views on food a bit.  I put smaller quantities in, but am aiming for just the right amount to be filling but not overdo it.  I find myself being more careful about my own food quantities.  I have never been good at eating everything on my plate but I try much harder now to take what I need so I have a good shot at finishing my plate and also not overdoing it.

The Hidden Value of the Village Shop: Why Math(s) is Easier to Learn in England

After school at the Village Shop (photo by Michael)

On Fridays after school, Anna likes to stop by the Village Shop to buy penny sweets.  I usually give her 20 pence and say she can pick whatever she likes for up to 20p for sharing with Michael and Grandparents.  The candies are 1p, 2p, 5p and 10p.  Because there isn't tax to add at the end, the prices are as written.  I have found that Anna can now very easily add up the amounts as she puts sweets in her little plastic basket.  She will occasionally put something back and grab another item (something I discourage but do see this a common occurrence among little fingers in the shop).  When she does this, the subtraction comes into play.  I was really surprised seeing Anna do all of this in her head.  So far, she is always correct.  The nice lady at the counter will add up her little basket, smile and say "Well done!" and slide the treats into a tiny bag, sometimes white and sometimes striped.

We don't have shops like this in America that I can think of.  The sweets at the Village Shop are simply priced (rather than weighed or taxed) and they are laid out at child level for their own choosing and counting.  There are lots of sweets too and very easy to grab.  There are no tongs; you use your fingers.  No one gets up in arms about that (or maybe they just don't shop there).  I have never seen a child get rambunctious or just take fist fulls of candy there.  Perhaps it does happen but the mannerly-ness of the society probably wards against it.

On a side note, I've noticed that while American stores and restaurants are very big on "sneeze guards" and separate tongs for separate items, that really isn't the case here.  The health and safety laws are probably different.  When John and I went to a big cineplex, they had a self-serve pick-a-mix candy and snacks area.  Though there were 30 things you could choose from, there were only a few tongs/scoops for all of them.  If you have allergies, I guess you just learn to never eat any of those snacks.  That would be the sensible thing to do.

The Importance of Manners

I'm at Michael and Anna's school a couple times a week, and have noticed that teachers often stop children due to manners.  "Where are your manners?" or "Please mind your manners!" or "You are being rude!" or my personal favorite, "MANNERS!"  I've heard that word more in the past 3 1/2 months than I recall hearing in my collective schooling from 5-21 years.

People in general widely recognize the concept of the English Gentleman--I always think of the display at the museum in Pittsburgh of "The English Gentleman" during the French and Indian War, for some reason, and my Dad has a joke about how you want a French chef, Italian lover and British police officer.  And we watch Downton Abbey and Brideshead Revisited as distinctively British shows not only due to the accents but the politeness, restraint and mannerly-ness of the people.

The pupils at St. Peters are called out on manners a lot in cases that I think would flit by more easily in an American public school, at least based on my own experiences.  Aside from the consistency of pleases and thank yous, I've seen children called out ("Manners!") for not quickly saying "excuse me" or "sorry" when accidentally bumping someone, for squeezing through a door past someone else, for "snatching" (rather than politely taking) paper from the teacher, speaking without being called on, cutting off someone mid-sentence, trying to dominate the discussion, taking more than one's share, being too loud...

When I helped out at Christmas Gift Afternoon, I was all smiles as children said lots of "Yes, please" and "No, thank you" and "Sorry" and "Excuse me".  Most children were very considerate of the people around them, keeping the gifts in order.  There were two brothers who accidentally walked off with some socks.  A few minutes later, the boys came back:  "May we buy this?  I'm so sorry but I believe we walked off without paying."  I think most American kids would do the same thing but perhaps state more to the point "Sorry, I forgot to pay.  Here you go."  British children/people leave a bit more room for their own error.

During Michael's class Christingle play, I liked seeing the representation of American Christians.  While they correctly pointed out the diversity of America, the kids were dressed in the standard jeans, baseball caps, cowboy hats, sweatshirts, flag colors.  They looked like Americans--casual, less about the formality of manners.

Funny, I happened to catch actress British Emma Watson (who played Hermione in Harry Potter) on the Ellen Show the other day talk about the difference between dating boys from America and England.

"English guys are very well put together... They dress really well and they are very well mannered. But they are also very restrained.... [American guys] are very like open and very straight-forward—but they wear flip-flops and I don't know if I like that."

I laughed out loud not just at the general, "oh I get it" but the fact that I can see that plain-as-day developmentally and culturally when I go into the school here compared with what I know of American schools and homes.

A Star and Shepherd are Born

Having heard of nativity plays all my life, I was excited that Anna and Michael were going to have a chance to be in their own.  It is a really nice English/Christian school tradition, a recognition of the season, a sense of community and bringing together of everyone before the end of winter term.

John, Grandma, Grandpa and I went to both kids' plays.  They were both very well done, and I was so proud of both children.  Anna's was first--the story of the star that couldn't shine over the manger.  All the Year 1's were little stars who sang 7 different songs to help tell the story of the nativity and the star that finally lit on Christmas day.  I was so delighted to see Anna walk onto the stage with her class, and stand right in the middle among her classmates.  She clearly poured her heart and soul into each song complete with hand gestures, sitting, standing, walking.  After the play, she actually waved to us in the audience.  Such a sweet moment.  We also got to see Michael who came in and left with his class.

Anna's nativity play: Our little star is in the middle

Michael's nativity play was a Christingle service--about the nativity (Michael's role as a shepherd) and Christ as the light of the world.  The latter showed how different countries celebrate Christmas so a lot of children were dressed in international costumes.  Each child held an orange to symbolize the world, containing a candle (Christ as the light), fruits (to represent fruits of the earth and seasons), and a red ribbon (Christ's blood).

In the service, Michael led the shepherds out at one point during a song.  He was so poised and even earned a code of conduct for helping his friend, a fellow shepherd, get into position.  Michael sang every song very clearly and seriously, and he gracefully balanced a crook, lamb and Christingle orange while standing, sitting, and walking.  I was incredibly proud.